CODEPENDENCY is a “psychological condition or a relationship in which a person manifesting low self esteem and a strong desire for approval has an unhealthy attachment to another often controlling and manipulative person (such as a person with an addiction to alcohol or drugs)” (Webster)
It has also been said that “codependency is a dependency upon someone who is dependent upon something undependable”.
Codependency is a Process Addiction. It is an addiction to a person. It is allowing another person to dictate how you feel , what you think and what you do. It is caring more about another person than you do about yourself. It is betraying yourself in order to please another. It is possible to be codependent upon partners, children, parents, and friends.
The roots of codependency are usually in childhood, where attachment is disrupted, and there is a fear of abandonment. Often people find their value and worth in helping others, possibly a need to be needed. Healing comes when a sense of worth and value is restored to a person, regardless of whether they are in a relationship or not, and regardless if they are approved or or pleasing to others.
Your therapist will help you heal the roots and learn to set appropriate boundaries with the difficult people in your life. You may be referred to a 12 step program for additional support.